this is copied over from a hilarious chat i just had with my good friend, carl spackler…i’m the Dude (of course, the names have been changed to protect the innocent)….i loved this story…so i felt it only right that i share it. enjoy.
Carl Spackler says:
saturday…we get down there around 4, the childrens are playin outside, and the adults are settin up on the porch…actually i am inside settin in the living room, but it was a nice day so they had the front door opened.
Carl Spackler says:
the childrens are playin, when all of a sudden one of the fathers starts yellin at them to stop. it seems that 3 of them were fighting. well, *lil kid*, who has the worst temper of any kid i have ever been around, takes ill to *grownup #1* yelling at him. *grownup #1* is not *lil kid*s father. *lil kid* is 8.
Carl Spackler says:
*lil kid* starts cussin *grownup #1*, and i quote…”shut the fuck up got damnit, your not my fuckin dad, and you don’t fuckin tell me what to do. you can go to fuckin hell.”
the Dude says:
lmao
Carl Spackler says:
at which point all the other parents start tellin *lil kid* to calm down…he then says, and i quote…”fuck all you guys, you bunch of fuckers, fuck you, got damn fuckin bitches, go to hell, you are a bunch of fuckers”
Carl Spackler says:
picture an 8 year old screamin to the top of his lungs, face red, slobberin and cryin
Carl Spackler says:
if he was my child i would not rest easy
Carl Spackler says:
he might have issues
Carl Spackler says:
so a few hours later we are playin cards, and he wants to play…it really pisses me off when the dads let their kids play, anyway *daddy* lets *lil kid* sit down and start playin…and with luck he wins like 2 hands in a row. so i am like i am not lettin this little fucker take anymore of my money and i am gonna teach these dads a lesson.
Carl Spackler says:
so the next game we play 7 card stud…i get dealt pocket kings, and then another king on the first deal…so i am full of kings after 3 cards. we bet, and i raise, and this little fucker raises me back, so i reraise. next deal another king…i have 4 kings now after 4 cards
the Dude says:
oooooooooo
Carl Spackler says:
but *lil kid* now has two aces showing…and his dad is tellin him to bet…so i raise, he raises me back…and the way they play, if you bet and someone raises then it is $3 limit
Carl Spackler says:
so i bet the limit…he calls. the next card i get his ace, so now i know i cannot be beat
the Dude says:
i love this story
Carl Spackler says:
i bet he raises, i bet the $3 limit and then his dad tells him to reraise…there is like over $50 in this pot now, because for some reason almost everyone else is in
the Dude says:
omg
Carl Spackler says:
we keep doing this until it is time to show, so a couple guys flop their hands and have like 2 pair, someone did have a straight…but then *lil kid* and *daddy* are like, not good enough, and *daddy* says show them *lil kid* as he starts rakin in the money, and *lil kid* has a full house.
Carl Spackler says:
so he is just lovin it, them i am like, well that is pretty good, but…well, the shit hit the fan then
the Dude says:
lmfao
Carl Spackler says:
i flop those kings in the whole and *daddy* just starts laughin…*lil kid* then starts cussin *daddy* for makin him bet, everyone starts tellin *lil kid* that is just part of it, you had a good hand, but, whatever, well he goes back into fuck this and fuck that, fuck you…i am just laughin at him now, which i think pissed some people off, but hey, he wants to play then learn how to play
Carl Spackler says:
lesson learned…needless to say, that was the end of cards that night
the Dude says:
LOL…wow…that is just perfect. little shit
the Dude says:
that could not have worked out any better
Carl Spackler says:
nope
Carl Spackler says:
he has no respect
Carl Spackler says:
and he will show me a little got damn respect the next time i see him